Chuckie Watch 41: Chuckie vs. Spain

Chuckie's been hearin' about what's been happenin' in Spain. And Chuckie don't like it: Political Terror.

In ChuckieWorld, things are pretty simple. Unless you think about it much. Or unless you think about it at all. But that doesn't usually happen in ChuckieWorld. So things stay simple.

In ChuckieWorld, fightin' The Terrorists means doin' whatever George W. Bush says. Especially when it comes to killin' foreigners. If you don't do what Bush the Magnificent says, why then you're heppin' The Terrorists, boy!

But let's see some of it in Chuckie's own words:

We have been making a lot of headway in our war on terror but last week the terrorists won a huge battle when the bombing of a train in Spain swayed the outcome of a very important election.

We all know the outcome of the election, a hard liner was defeated by someone who will, from all appearances, be much softer in his approach to fighting terror.

But that’s not the point, the people of Spain have the sovereign right to elect whatever kind of government they so desire, conservative, liberal, socialist or communist for that matter, but the point is that their decision was made under duress. They went to the polls scared to death and in essence told the terrorists, ”We’ll get our troops out of Iraq, just don’t hurt us anymore.”

Now, not one sentence of that has any clear basis in reality. If we wanted to be generous to the dweller(s) of ChuckieWorld, we could say that the first sentence is at least an interpretation. But the only real evidence that the 11-M attack in Madrid actually affected the election has to do with two things: a higher turnout than expected, and popular anger at the government for not being honest about the attack in the immediate aftermath.

All the rest - that the new Spanish government will be "softer" on terrorism, that Spainards voted "under duress" (unlike some precincts in Florida in 2000 when old-fashioned Southern techniques were used to intimidate black voters), or that Spanish voters think that withdrawing from Iraq will make them safe from attack - is pure Republican fantasy. (And I wonder how they distinguish between liberal, socialist and communist in ChuckieWorld.)